A grieving father on NPR said that loss doesn't fade, but that it just becomes less immediate. 2 weeks and 4 days after Ellie died, I have to agree. Some days, I almost forget that she's gone, other days I weep as I did the first night, and once, for a second, I forgot that we'd even known her.

But each time, I'm snapped out of it and the fact that she's gone hits me anew. Yes, she's in a better place, in the company of some amazing dogs and people, but my life has a huge hole in it where she used to be. Death is not hard for the dying but rather for those their passing leaves behind.

In this case, it's me left behind.

Don't try to say ' you only had her for 6 months and 8 days, you couldn't possibly have loved her that intensely' because it's not true. Knowing that our time with her was to be short, I made the most of every day I had with her, doing my best to treasure at least one memory from each day. We truly packed a lifetime into 6 months and 8 days, I don't know how I could possibly muster that kind of intensity again.