3.31.2000

A tribute to my living-with-his parents-friend, Thoma: Adult children living at home can be costly.

boo.com has a crazy site but lots of cool t-shirts, which are the staple of my wardrobe.

I was told that it's virtually impossible to talk about me without mentioning the fact that I'm a lesbian. It makes me wonder -- I'd always consider being gay to be something that's sort of low on the list of things that I am, behind being adopted, doing dog rescue and having this weird Web-based life. And yet, other people perceive it as higher on the list than that. Why? I'm like to think that I'm so open about it that it's a non-issue. After all, it seems odd to me that most of my friends are straight and are people's wives. Maybe I should start referring to people as "my straight friend". But most of them are so the irony would be lost.

Andrea's mom came to visit last night. We picked her up at the house of some relatives in San Francisco. It was the usual sort of meeting, where they try to remember to speak mostly English on my account. I was thrilled that I finally know just enough Chinese that it wasn't that hard to follow along. But gone is the allure of the imagined conversations I told myself they were having about exotic things.

3.30.2000

How can you ever know how a company's going to do? The world is no longer filled with stable companies looking for people to perform specific jobs. Instead, it's all about some schmuck with an idea trying to pull it off, handing out stock as if it was worth something.

I love the medicine combination on this piece of software -- PillPal

Alice starred in her first movie yesterday, but it takes FOREVER to download. She's so cute, it's worth the wait. You're been warned.

Saw another phine movie last night. Detroit Rock City didn't change my life, but it did keep me laughing. I can't sit through long drawn-out movies that make me think anymore. Has the one-click wonder of the Web robbed me of my attention span?

Jewish people always seem to be right on.Reform Rabbis Approve Gay Unions -- no exception. From Marnie.

Got an email from a recruiter today. But not any recruiter, one from an established, decent-sized company that I was itching to work for a couple of years ago. The job is everything I want to --Web Content Manager. All the buzzwords I'd hoped for. The thing is, I just got here 6 weeks ago and I'm not sure leaving is the right thing to do. Damn this hopping job market and damn my marketable skills.

Someone from Senac wrote to me about using their forums, clubs and other utilities. I don't really want them, but if any of you do, there they are.

In case you're wondering, my initials are for the Emerald, Queensland, Australia airport. Find yours here. Thanks John

"I speak with my Johnson" -- Howard Stern

3.29.2000

The basis of love is compassion. And if it's not, it ought to be.

So many things on the Web (and in the world) defy description, includingLouisiana Pollywogs - Louisiana Songs for Kids.

Last night, I cooked dinner, and like the challenger on the Iron Chef, I made an unprecidented fourth dish!

I am so addicted to Word Racer.

According to this, my fingers are too long for me to be a lesbian. What does that mean?

I briefly dated a rather butch-looking woman in college. These days, she's posing as a man, and passing. Does that mean that I'm straight?

Kottke's right. "Replace all instances of "The Holy Spirit", "God", and "Christ" with the word "marijuana" or the phrase "copious amounts of alcohol" and suddenly those pictures start to make a lot more sense. Teens Hit at the CITGO Station.

My middle school days weren't pretty. Not only was I kinda dumpy, short on fashion sense and had a bizarre attraction to other girls, the kids were downright mean. The only solace I found was at this church. I didn't really beleive in what they were preaching, but the few tenuous friendships I had depended on that church so I 'amen'ed with the best of them. I'm sure that if my little friends had an encounter with the holy spirit like those kids at the Citgo station, I would've been down there writhing and frothing with the power of the Holy Spirit.

Of course, as soon as I mentioned my bizarre attraction to other girls, my church friends weren't nearly as welcoming as they had been. I hope that they're more understanding these days. Their ignorance turned me away from God. And where am I now? Oh yeah, a happy heathen!

Admittedly, the Web has made the world both bigger and smaller at the same time. But some sites seem to forget that unless their jobs are all tele-commuting, it would be nice to know where exactly they are located.

Ever wanted to know what Jeeves was thinking? Now you can know! Thanks TBTF

Last night, I was reading Newsweek, minding my own business and there it was. A big picture of Mark Breier, former CEO of beyond, in an article about failing Internet companies. When he started there, I didn't know much about the exciting world of startups, I blindly assumed that since he was from Amazon, he knew what he was doing. Nobody can pinpoint the exact cause of beyond's slide (although I therorize that it started with the aquisition of buydirect in Feb. 99) but now that Breier's gone, everyone feels comfortable pinning it on him. Is that fair? Is it true? The stock remains in the toilet.

This article quotes some former employees. It's weird to think that having worked there somehow makes us newsworthy (not that the author talked to me). At times, it felt like a family, now here's our family business in a national magazine. It's odd, very odd, and sad.

Remember how the Douglas Adams series, he says that the answer to life's biggest question is 42? I think I've found the question: Is Yoda Amish!? Thanks Amy.

Our vet recommended either keeping Alice in a crate all day or building a dog run in our "backyard." I use the term loosely because it's really a patio with a fence. If we installed a dog run, there'd be no room for anything else. The other option is to wear her out, keep to her schedule religiously and make sure she knows that we still love her (duh) and hopefully she'll forget all about that little hole in the fence that has since been plugged up.

I decided to foster the 10 year old beagle at the Berkeley Shelter. We'll call her Ellie. It just kills me that, come selection time, the old grey dogs get killed first. I can't save them all, but at least we've saved one more.

3.28.2000

Not sure why this is so funny, but it is.

There's a 10 (or older) year old female beagle at this shelter. Naturally, I want to leave everything and go save her, given her age, she's sure to be high on the kill list, but I can't right now and it's killing me. Why is that I want to help every older dog who needs a second chance, but I have no desire to live in the middle of nowhere, where I could have tons of dogs?

As another former employee of Clip2, I feel obligated to link to this article, which highlights many of the reasons that I was unable to do my best work there. Mostly because I just didn't see the point in what they're doing. Especially now, when they aren't even a bookmark manager anymore. What they are, I'm not sure. Thanks to brig for the article.

Has the Web robbed us of civility? Instant messages tend to end without any fanfare or farewell, most of the time we just stop typing. I have one friend who does make signing off a huge production, a full two minutes of "l8r", "c-ya", "great talking to ya"'s and the like. I admit it, it bugs me. I've become so used to the brevity of the Web and instant messages that it's an odd throwback to a friendlier time.

The debate over how much to say on the Web makes me wonder what we're missing by writing shorter and what if anything, we're gaining in writing longer. I think there's a place for both, as long as the expectations are clear. I don't go to a weblog looking for 3000 words, I expect longer pieces to be harder to find.

Network connection is very slow. Did someone break the Internet again?

Have you noticed that a job is no longer called a job, instead now they're called gigs? Does that mean that when I go to play music with an audience that it's now called a job? But then again, I generally refer to pooping as doing a job so really, what is work called again?

ohmygod. Who knew that you could put Whoopi Goldberg on a dessert? Thanks ev for making me look at Whoopi and baked goods in a whole new light.

Alice's big adventure
Andrea got a call yesterday that Alice had somehow escaped. We'd weeded the jungle, aka the patio, and I guess there was a beagle-sized hole there. She got out and ate everything she could find, including:
  • guacamole
  • cracked crab
  • chicken carcasses (way, way more than one)
  • cheese
  • cat poop
Consider that she's normally 19.5 pounds and you may wonder (as I continually do) how it all fits in her little belly.

We had her stomach pumped and blocked the hole in the fence. To make sure our blockade worked, I waited by the hole until she came out and tried to break free. She couldn't get out so she stood there barking in frustration.

Better that than another escape.

3.27.2000

My worst nightmare came true. Somehow Alice got out today. I think it was my fault. Evidently someone found her, though. Good thing I switched collars so the one with the tags that have every phone number related to us on it.

This is why I love South Park, or anything that propels ordinary folks to stardom while still keeping the great stuff that made them famous in the first place. In other words, I'm tired of people getting lame after becoming famous. You don't always have to sell out just because your paycheck gets huge.

Visited the humane society yesterday and fell in love with April, a pointer mix (scroll down, you'll see her). She jumped up so I could pet her without bending down and stood there on her hind legs so I could reach her. She kept falling backwards, but that didn't stop her. The good news is that the kennels were only 1/3 full.

Did you ever wonder what exactly eBay stock holders are buying stock in? Really, you're buying stock in what some guy dug out of his basement. Okay, maybe it's the technology that brings that guy together with another guy who wants that stuff, but it's still kind of weird to think about.

In a related note, Amazon's auctions have but a fraction of the bids that ebays do -- on the same stuff.

In the 70's there was a gas station on every corner. In the 80's there was a bank on every corner. Today there's a Starbucks.

Am I missing something?

Anyone who says that women aren't being exploited anymore needs to see this. It's Howard Stern's dream come true -- just boobs!

If I won an academy award I would end my acceptance speech by saying 'Help control the pet population, have your pet spayed or neutered'.

The advantage of having a bunch of email addresses is that I can get multiple chances to win stuff on freelotto without actually spamming my friends, I can just spam myself.

Week 3 (I think) of not cursing. Of course I've lapsed more than once, but on the whole, it's proving to be a good thing. Makes me choose my words more carefully, always a good thing.

I finally added to my growing arsenal of musical instruments with a clarinet. All mine for the low price of $65, so even if it sucks, it wasn't a huge investment. Since I haven't played one in 10 years, it may be slow going. Roughly 1/3 of the notes are the same as on the sax, so I'll be able to play at least that much.

Wow! Hilary Swank won the Oscar for Boys Don't Cry. I was stunned, couldn't stop saying 'Hilary Swank' for at least an hour. How the world has changed, that not only was this tremendous movie made, but distributed and watched widely enough that it could win this award. I only hope that it makes things a little easier for folks who are struggling with their gender identity like Brandon Teena was.

Given that I now live in a state where marriage is officially defined as between a man and a woman, though, I have to wonder if we've really come as far we think.

3.24.2000

Le Blogeur is pretty damn funny. He looks like the kind of guy who would use the word "dahngerous" repeatedly.

Thanks to brig for sending me a new copy of my favorite movie, Office Space. It's one of those rare movies that I find myself watching over and over again. In case you're wondering, I'm the pale pasty white guy who listens to rap loudly in his souped up Sentra. Except that I'm not a guy and I have a Passat.

Maybe I'm an idiot, or maybe there's a bona-fide bug in the state tax form that I needed. Either way, I now have the complete 64 page booklet because I couldn't get the 1 page that I actually needed to print. Which means that I have at least 3 copies of every tax form California has to offer. Ugh.

We've seen some fine movies this week. Bowfinger was hilarious. I'm a long time Steve Martin fan, since he wrote it, I was sure it was going to be good. And it was. Not change your life good, but keep you laughing good.

Part 2 of our unintentional Eddie Murphy fest was Holy Man. Another quality slice of entertainment. Again, it didn't change my life, but it did keep me focused for the duration of the film. No small feat for my spastic self.

Our 3rd film of the week was Erin Brockovich, which featured Julia Roberts in some seriously trashy outfits but kept me entertained despite it's bladder-testing 2.5 hour run time.

Were I less exhausted, I'd use this down time to do something great. Like what? I have no idea. Usually I do the stuff I've been putting off when I'm in the middle of a huge project since my energy level is in overdrive and for a while, I'm superwoman. Today I'm just tiredwoman.

It's been a slow week here in the exciting world of work. Good things are going on with the higher-ups, but there's not a lot going on with the peons.

In other news, I dreamt in UNIX last night.

3.23.2000

Toyota is trying too hard to capture a younger market. Just because my dad has a Camry (just like everyone else's dad) doesn' t mean that you have to have a super slick website to get my attention.

No comment

I did it. For the first time in the 6 months since I left beyond I went back to visit. I'd avoided doing this because I knew it wouldn't be easy. The people who work there (for the most part) are fabulous. Smart and fun, were it not for one guy, I'd probably still be there today. He made my life so miserable that I felt I had no choice but to leave. Of course he's gone now, too, along with 1/2 the people who were there then.

A year ago it was like shangra-la. Yes, we worked hard. Yes, a lot of stuff was wrong but the people were by and large great fun to be around and the only serious problems were with upper management. You can still have fun if management sucks, the regular folks were far enough removed from it.

Since I've left, I've been at 3 different companies. The first one, I didn't even like that much, but the salary was astounding enough that I felt I had to take it. The second was a 3 day nightmare and the third is turning out to be pretty good. But not like beyond of a year ago is for me, not like the place and the people that make me cry because I miss them. Nothing can be that place again but the few people I saw today were enough to make me cry because I miss them.

I think everyone has a time and place that can never be recaptured. First love, first kiss, whatever. My time at beyond was one of those things, I wonder if I'll spend the rest of my working years looking for it.

Realized today that my things that rule section was remiss for not including the almighty, wonderful, excellent blogger. So now it does and always, thanks to blogger for making the world a better place.

Got myself a loan yesterday. Within 15 days, I'll have enough cash to buy out the lease on my most excellent car, thus changing my monthly lease payment into a purchasing payment. I learned all about daily compounded interest in this process and all I know now is that I'm in a huge hurry to pay it off.

I must chuckle at the prolific typos in this job. Anyone out there a Firewords developer?

3.22.2000

Yet another spectacular headline: Palestinian Refugees Hail Pope, Then Fight.

Yesterday my benevolent boss and I were discussing the Amiga, lamenting it's demise and today I find this. It's like Disco, it never quite left and yet it's making a comeback.

The good folks at Blogger added exciting new ways to display the date and time. Rest assured, I'll try each of them at least once!

brig found this this... thing and I'm just not sure what to say about it. It seems so creepy.

It hadn't occurred to me that a discussion forum is the logical next step in this endeavor. Is it? My former employer is trying to capture an easy to use way to share the web, I just didn't see why how it would work. There's a fine line between true interaction and a set of links. I like to think that a blog captures that, giving you, my most excellent readers, a way to find some new stuff on the web with a little bit of background along with it. Somehow, a discussion forum doesn't fit into what I intended. (not that I'm sure what I do intend)

Newsweek had a good article about all of us becoming intimate strangers, how we're connected with this web thing, but yet we're not. I think the web gives us (okay, me) a place to share things that we might not otherwise, but then it makes it easy to forget that there's a big pretty world outside. I admit to getting so caught up in my head that I forgot.

But... I've always been a writer (it's only the last couple of years that I've been paid for it). That means a lifetime inside my head, thinking of things to say, how to say it and how to write it. The magnificent medium of blogging only makes that worse or at least easier.

3.21.2000

Had to link to this article because it uses the word chippie.

If you can't call yourself an ass occasionally, then perhaps you're not laughing enough.

I'm an ass

Feeling the need to quote myself here,

"I've realized that you can't always make people happy. Sometimes I'm just going to say stuff that not everyone likes and there's not a damn thing I can do about it. Nothing I say is meant to be malicious, while I may think of malicious things to say, I rarely say (or write) them. It's not worth pissing people off."

If I am to have a child while still driving my 99 Passat, I must take the P, A, and T off so it becomes a 99 ASS. Lest my child think that I'm a grownup.

No idea where brig found this, but I'm weeping.

This article is right on. With so many companies trying to get off the ground, traditional option plans aren't going to cut it anymore. Who wants to wait a year when your options could be worth nothing? I would rather have a decent salary and interesting work than a truckload of options (aka lottery tickets). 10,000 shares of nothing is just that. Thanks to brig for the article.

Alice is feeling better today, but now she can't bark so I guess she's got a sore throat. Someone suggested this collar instead of the plastic model she's currently sporting.

3.20.2000

Is it just me, or does Macy Gray look like a derelict? I really like her music, but every time I see her on tv, I think 'derelict'.

I keep thinking that my phone is ringing and pausing to look at it. Maybe I'm going crazy.

Alice is so miserable in her new torture device, I had to take some pictures. We're headed back to the vet later today for some relief.

Last Friday, I had every intention of making a list of the good things that have happened in the last year. After all, it was a pretty good year. So here it is, a little late:
  • Alice came home. Honestly, I'm not sure how the sun came up every morning before she was part of my life.
  • Weezy, my 1972 VW Squareback fell into my lap, fulfilling my dreams for a vintage VW.
  • I finally got an excellent job where I can do all the stuff I like to do, close to home and for a decent salary.
That's all I can think of for now.

Reno was a trip, as always. We saw many many mullets and fat people in tight clothes. And of course, thatched huts!

My party was okay. Before everyone arrived, Amy and I got really really wasted and watched the Iron Chef, where the competitor made an unprecidented 4 dishes. We were enthralled. Andrea showed up with a bag of ice. In my altered state, I tried to empty the sealed bag into the freezer. It didn't work very well, but I kept trying for quite some time until Andrea took over. While my house was filled with people, I was so grumpy that I just wanted them to leave. And it was my party for what may have been my worst birthday in recent history.

I feel like an ass
My mom's dog, Buddy has terminal cancer, which causes pain. So he's been taking Rimadyl. Turns out that this drug causes serious liver problems, and death. I usually do gobs of research on everything that the dogs in my life take, but this time I didn't. Hope it hasn't done any damage yet...

3.17.2000

Took Amy to Malibu Grand Prix yesterday. 6 laps is definitely enough. My left butt cheek hurts today.

You can't go wrong with a domain name like deliciousbutt. Pants off to you!

Interesting way to spam someone: email them about a broken link on their site, then offer them your service (for a fee) to keep checking. Kinda creepy.

My birthday is going better. Had a phine lunch that included a birthday beer from Andrea. That's love. Unrequested beer when I needed it most.

Stopped at home to give Alice her new allergy pill. We didn't have any cottage cheese, so I put it in peanut butter. She looked exactly like the dog in the milk commercial, couldn't stop licking. It was *so* worth it.

Just when I think my life sucks, I find this:Infant Peddled on Videotape. I hope this little girl never finds out that her dad tried to sell her for $60k.

Why is that adopting a kid today costs about $20k, but sperm only costs $300?

My lovely co-workers did a nice job decorating my door in a South Park theme. Thanks!

Things are looking up, I'm about to head to a phine birthday lunch with parts of the crowd from the good old days of Beyond, and of course the visiting dignitary, Amy. I'm sure to consume some green beer.

When I was little, I had stellar birthdays, with parties and all the trimmings. When I was a teenager, birthdays were full of angst. Being adopted, I would spend my birthday thinking of the mystery woman who had shared this day with me, then entrusted me to my family and dropped out of our lives. I'd wonder where she was, what she was doing, if she thought about me. I'd get so caught up in this long-distance drama that I'd often end up in tears, unable to celebrate because I was so worried that she was out there somewhere and sad on my account.

These days, I know who she is, where she is, and that in fact she is thinking of me. In fact I got a really stellar gift from her! Just knowing that she knows I'm okay makes it easy to stop the melodrama and enjoy my birthday once again. So hey, thanks for sharing this day with me 27 years ago, and for trusting my parents to do right by me. And for the genetic predisposition to fart jokes. Now *that's* a legacy!

Some birthday. I've already had a fight with Andrea, (we made up, though) then got to listen to my mom tell me that I've made her life miserable since she only adopted Ben (the new dog) because she wanted make me happy. Now that things are more hectic since he's home, (and they've tried to return him twice) she's decided that everything wrong in her life is my fault.

Yeah, happy fucking birthday to me.

3.16.2000

Amy is on her way. Through the miracle of the Internet, I can see that she's at 31000 feet and her speed is 419 knots. I love the Web.

Finally found a soprano sax that I have a shot at getting on ebay. I won't link to it, don't want to jinx it, but it's a beauty. I'm so stoked but trying desperately not to get my hopes up.

3.15.2000

I think I'd like one of these for my birthday. (size XL please) Hard to believe I'm going to be 27 in 2 days. It's like I'm really a grownup. Or something.

In honor of Amy's impending arrival via a priceline ticket, here's a lovely tribute to William Shatner.

If she doesn't get red carpet treatment at rock bottom prices, I'll call Mr. Shatner himself!

You can't make up headlines like this: Hajj pilgrims prepare for ritual stoning of devil.

Who-eee! A new look. Not that I had time to do it, but once I get started, it's hard to stop.

Found a really interesting blog from a lesbian writer. She's way ahead of me in rejections, I'd better start submitting more writing to catch up.

Yes, I changed the name of my blog. Why? Because I can. Unlike work, where I have to worry about diluting the brand, changing the name of my blog doesn't affect my market share.

It's also freeing to know that I can design my own sites to be as cheesy as I want. After all, they're my stuff, not professional stuff that the stockholders are going to be scrutinizing.

I wonder if the guy in the office next to mine can hear me fart.

I'm so looking forward to Amy's arrival tomorrow. Not only did her ticket come through William Shatner, we're sure to have a weekend full of drunken debauchery. It all starts with my birthday party Friday (no gift required, just be ready for some frozen girlie drinks), then we're off to Reno for free drinks at the one-armed bandits. I can't wait!

If these kids saw the virgin mary in the Coke machine instead of a busty woman, they'd call it a miracle.

It's so easy to type eee instead of www. Maybe there should be a new set of domain names starting with eee.

Who knew that My Little Pony and porn stars shared the same names? See how many you know here.

One day at beyond, we were all a little loopy and conducted a meeting where we called each other only by our porn names. (according to this method, it's the name of your first pet and the first street you lived on) Mine is Daisy Essex, the best ones were Nibbles Chilton and Chickens Johnson.

I've been trying to buy a decent soprano sax on ebay for a while and keep getting outbid to a point where I don't think it's worth it. I'm so ready to have one so it's driving me crazy.

3.14.2000

This seems kinda cool, but like so many other sites out there, it's way too complicated for me.

I must confess that I love Reno and Vegas. Filled to the brim with cheesiness, they are everything that America can be. Non-stop action and tacky rooms. Ahh, the stuff of life.

Thatched huts!

While Amy is here this weekend, we're headed to Reno. Originally this was going to be for the day, but my brother has volunteered to Alice-sit so we're staying at the lovely Atlantis Casino Resort, which has thatched huts!

Ever wondered what's happening in the exciting world of clogging?

For the love of Julie is the creepiest, most addictive creepy thing I've seen in a while.

The other day I went to a beyond alumni party. Two VPs were leaving and had this classy bash. It was like a high school reunion, but better because the people I worked with at beyond knew me as a more fully-formed person than the kids I went to high school with.

Amy found this lovely site instead of blogger:Carl�s Clogging Supplies.

How I found this, I'm not sure but I couldn't help linking to it.

FYI: Did you know that it's illegal to withold a reference from a former employee based on what that employee thinks or says about the company?

Quote from Andrea: stop trying to send me your toilet!

My IM icon is a lovely animated toilet. Tee hee.

3.13.2000

Still at work. I just took a moment to enthusiastically zone out, I think it paid off. I feel refreshed.

Taking Alice to the vet today. She has a lump on her foot that keeps growing. Part of being a 10 year old dog does entail various lumps and bumps, but after my mom's dog was diagnosed with terminal cancer last year, I'll go the extra mile to get each and every one checked out.

Trying to work and stuff but I'm in a holding pattern while the (most excellent) COO runs my site past the board. I'm sure I'll have to change everything after they talk.

The COO is excellent because she said to me "at a certain point, we have to get out of your way and let you do what we hired you to do." Which is all I've ever wanted. After that, I've vowed to follow this woman in any direction she chooses.

Amy asked me to update the link to her site to include her new fames. There ya go, missie!

Had a little karmic goodness last night. We went to the Pho place for dinner. At the table next to us was a fine lesbian policewoman, fully decked out in both her police and lesbian uniforms, so all the world knew exactly what she was. The white trash family across from us noted her appearance and laughed as she left the resturant. Classy.

Even classier -- when they went to pay their $25 tab, their credit card was denied!!! The trashy parents had to beg the trashy kids for money, they all got flustered and embarrassed. Who knew that karma could work that fast?

I am so in love with ebay. Where else can you find an LP of PROSTITUTES, PIMPS, HOMOSEXUALS?

3.10.2000

Learn all there is to know about the very first all terrain vehicle, the zamboni. Thanks to Niel for this gem.

"It's not evacuation from Bosnia, it's just a job" says my boss.

Occasionally I drive rescued dogs to their new homes. Recently, I tried to get involved in another run and it was so insanely messed up that I finally gave up and backed out. Looks like the organizer (using that term loosely) assumed I was still in. Now they want me to drive to Valencia today (never mind my job), then up to Sacremento. That's 5 hours down there, then 5 hours to Sacremento and 2 hours home. Are you kidding?

I don't mind helping but I do mind being walked on. And these people have wrongly assumed that I have Welcome tattooed on my back. Sheesh.

3.09.2000

It's a good thing I don't have an active webcam going here. Far too often I realize that I'm dancing while I'm working thanks to the miracle of my own office and headphones.

I used to design for Netscape, thinking IE was the Dark Side, and because Netscape was a lot more forgiving about tags that weren't 100% accurate. But now, I wish Netscape would just go away.

Thanks to brig for this sad tale of what once changed the world, but now is merely part of AOL's world domination. It may be inevitable that every great idea gets assimilated into the world of conglomerates. But that doesn't mean it's painless or easy to watch.

Realized that it's Lent when I saw a woman with ashes on her forehead. I've always found that tradition fascinatingly morbid. It's inspired the relapsed Catholic in me to give something up for Lent, so I've decided to stop cursing. This should help expand my vocabulary so it can't be all bad. No, I'm hardly a practicing Catholic anymore, except for being driven by guilt. Just want to see if I can go a month without cursing. So far, no.

What seems to be an endless river of venture capital money has got to dry up at some point. IPO's aren't what they used to be, so the giants that drive the world I live in are soon to give up all the .com companies and turn to something more lucrative like biomedical stuff.

While my friend Gail was visiting from Oregon, she was amazed at all the ads for .com companies. So she ran around screaming "DOT COM DOT COM" to anyone who would listen. That's what the radio sounds like anymore. .com this, .com that, .com my ass. They're all just stores.

So I wrote back to the guy who was offering me the job:

Liz,
Thank you for the inquiry (my inquiry?? he wrote to me). Would you happen to know of any strong Editor/Writer types that would be open to an equity based opportunity within the Web Content space?

Here's my response
As a matter of fact, I do. But they all live here and considering the number of equity based opportunity within the Web Content space within driving distance of their homes, I'm sorry to say that they wouldn't be too interested in your company at this time.

Does this guy (and at least 100 other companies) not understand that this is the hottest job market ever? That (as my most excellent boss says) average people are getting cushy salaries and getting rich while extremely talented people in other fields are barely making a living wage?

People: Stock options are no longer enough

Too many of us have been burned (yes, that includes me and almost everyone else from beyond) on options. These days, we expect options, but we also want working heat, cubes of our own and some very big-company comforts. The IPO gold rush is starting to run dry and a great many of us got nothing along the way. Now we want some stability and interesting work with the vague hope of an IPO. At least I do.

Wow! Amy found the most amazing thing. Reminds me of the Coke machine we had at beyond (when it was still software.net). I got great satisfaction in putting no money into the machine and still having a Coke come out. There was a button labelled After 5 that dispensed beer. When we moved to the new building (which they've since outgrown, left, then downsized enough that they have to sublease part of the new new building) we left that wonderful machine behind. Now I work somewhere without free drinks but still manage to like my job. At my last job, I would often gaze at the free drinks and think 'free drinks are not enough'.

If you've ever wondered why there's a booming industry of pet accessories, it's because of people like me. We ended our quest for a lovely raincoat for Miss Alice last night, so of course there must be pictures to record the historic occasion. What can I say? I have no children, Alice will get all of my maternal affection until I do.

Got this little ditty in my inbox today:

Liz,

Good day! On behalf of (random company) I'd like to introduce you to our exciting organization. Would you be open to exploratory discussions? Please advise.

Thank You

Best Regards,

Guy who sent the email

I assume he means, do I want a job there, but what a weird way to put it.

3.08.2000

This Netscape bug is kicking my ass. Will I be forced to add a disclaimer that says 'I couldn't get my act together so this site should only be viewed in IE 5.0 or higher on a PC'? That would suck.

that said, I must apologize to brig for desiging one of these sites. I didn't mean to, it just happened. Is that how accidental pregnancy occurs?

Of course the site I'm referring to is nowhere near going live, so you can't see it in Netscape and discover that I'm right, that it's created for IE. But soon, I hope, you will. Hopefully I'll fix the bugs before then.

It's killing me, but I'm actually building a site that's formatted for IE 4.0 and higher. What's become of me??? Have I given into the Man? Sigh.

Finally, answers to my life's greatest questions! Thanks Sarah.

A Jetta by any other name is still a Jetta.

VW announced some exciting new stuff at the Geneva Auto Show. I'd dreamed of their upcoming SUV until I saw it, but the Sharan looks more like what I want. Maybe I won't keep the Passat forever...

I cannot stop staring at the disco ball on this page.

I've been thinking of buying a soprano sax (which I could play reasonably well right away) or a clarinet (which would require some squeaks as I learned it). Found this nastiness today. Has the iMac changed everything for the worse?

If you buy stuff, then have opinions about that stuff that you'd like to share, checkthis out.

It's official, I'm a bitch! TheSpark.com BitchTest rated me 55% bitch, above the average of 38%. Don't know if I should be flattered or disturbed.

3.07.2000

Being gay used to be a curse, now everyone wants to be gay. I assumed that I would always be denied certain things because of who I am, including health insurance (beyond.com offers this, I could be insured through Andrea if I needed to), to get married (we still won't, everyone we know who's done that broke up soon after. Why chance a good thing?). The only right I'd like to have set in stone is Andrea's right to parent our (still a glimmer in my eye) potential forthcoming child. I never expected famous people to look at my lesbian nature with the green eyes of jealousy. That's just weird.

Being gay isn't something I think about too often. Right or wrong, I've always felt that because I'm gay, doesn't mean I must be political.

Found a great gay blog, though. web queeries has lotsa good stuff, so I can at least feel like I'm part of this community (when I want to be).

Doing everything I can to avoid working. I've got an HTML problem that I can't seem to fix and my brain hurts just thinking about it.

r35 may make the best mousepad on the planet, but their site design kinda sucks. You can't have everything.

The best $12.95 I spent on work related stuff is this mousepad. It has all the web-compatible colors with their hex codes. Kicks ass.

Woo hoo! I finally got a real machine at work. I can drag and drop again. The POS they'd given me would crash every time I tried to move a file.

My dream vacation is a week in Orlando, alternating between DisneyWorld and Universal Studios Islands of Adventure. Disney has the best site for actually planning this trip. Do you think they'll mind us using the honeymoon package when not only are we lesbians, but we've been together almost 4 years?

We decided to try a new resturant last night, Thai Chili. It was completely empty but we took a chance. Painful is the only way to describe it. The waitress spoke less than no English, the pad thai was raw, when we pointed that out, they cooked another batch for us, with different noodles, some COMPLETELY RAW. The chef even showed us the package, as if we were crazy for not liking raw noodles. When we paid, they didn't give our credit card back- when we asked for it the non-English speaking waitress thought we wanted business cards, so instead of the amex card, we got lovely menus and business cards. Glad I got them, so I could link to their $5 Front Page website.

Thumbs down on that place.

3.06.2000

Have you noticed how many of my fellow bloggers seem to find the same stuff? It's not bad, but kinda funny to see the same links on a bunch of different blogs.

Has anyone tried writing blog haiku? It seems like a logical next step. I'll post some if you write 'em and send 'em to me.

blogging all day long
try to work, can only blog
blogging is my life

talk out my ass
just wind, or maybe magic
my blog, my true voice

I have these noble goals of always using style sheets like a good coder, but sometimes I don't want to define anything else. I know it will kick me in the ass later, but for now I'm coding the old fashioned way, with the font tag.

Spent the weekend sick like death was knocking, but I was too sick to answer. Just say no to bad Chinese food.

Had a new foster dog for less than 24 hours. We brought him home at 7 pm on Saturday, and had a new home for him at 8 pm. Dropped him off yesterday.

I'm now officially helping the beagle rescue screen potential adopters. I'm flattered that the woman who runs it thinks I'm a careful screener. Some people think that because we're doing rescue (saving dogs who have turned up at shelters or been abused) that we won't be picky, we'll just be glad to find them a home. Wrong! Our goal is to find the right home for these dogs, so they stay there the rest of their lives. I'd rather turn foster a dog for months than have someone adopt them and return them.

3.03.2000

Ben the beagle finally made his way home to my mom's house. Buddy and Ben are getting along famously, although Ben decided to pee in the house while I was on the phone. Mom's not a big fan of indoor canine urination.

Do you really think Microsoft will do something with Linux. Ironically, my friend Art started this controversy. Good going, Art!

Behold, a veritable plethora of those pens that change scenes when you turn them, including all time favorites like the last supper, OJ's Bronco chase and of course, Jesus Walking on Water. Wow.

This morning Andrea and I went to McDonald's for a nutritious breakfast. There was a guy wearing a bicycle helmet sitting outside, he asked if we could 'help him' with a breakfast sandwich. Help how? With unwrapping it? The guy had a brand new bike and didn't seem homeless or even unemployed, but who knows. I realized that I hate it when people beg from me, but if someone was too stoned to go in and get their own food, I'd probably get it for them. Nothing sucks worse than being stoned, having the munchies but being too stoned to move.

I don't know what's so damn fascinating about this commercial or the excellent parody but I can't stop answering my phone with a hearty 'whassup', followed by a 'yo'.

Liz, posting to blogger, havin' a bud.

It used to be that I'd start my day by reading the news. These days I'd rather read brig's blog. Maybe it's because we're not working together anymore (although the last place we worked together was an open room and everyone heard everything you said, so we didn't talk much there except to sneak outside and speak in hushed voices that made the higher ups nervous). I dunno, but her blog is usually more interesting than the news.

Andrea's car was in the shop all week, so I've been driving my 1972 VW Squareback. People take great pleasure in zooming past that car, as if there's any glory in besting a 28 year old car that, in her prime, had a top speed of 84 mph. Assholes.

3.02.2000

Here's a guy who tried to scan his cat. I wonder how Alice would feel about being scanned. She's small enough to fit on the scanning surface.

Web design aside, this woman makes some kick-ass soaps.

One of the many advantages of being a one person webteam is not needing to check with anyone. Someone wanted to try yet another design and I said no, there's not time. Since I'm pretty intimate with the entire team's (my) schedule, I said it confidently and my judgement on the team's behalf was accepted.

I heart my job.

This photo is always good for a laugh. It's one of the few relics of my stepford wives days. The guy in the picture was my fiance at the time. Guess I've come a long way since then...

This should come as no surprise to anyone, but having a blog is addictive. Amy has joined the growing ranks of bloggers.

I'm speechless but intrigued by the Psycho Stalker From Hell. Some people just don't understand what no means.

I never know how to react to a site like (link removed) this. It's done by someone who's trying to make a living as a web designer and I don't know how to say that using Front Page as an editor (then leaving the meta tag in at the top) will most likely not get you a lot of business. Or will it? Do people still pay for design like this? Maybe I'm jaded by all the slick designs I see at work and there's still a huge industry for people who do sites like these.

3.01.2000

This is a typical scene from my office.

This came up on a search for more about Tattoo. It's morbidly addictive. Cockpit Voice Recorder Lastwords. I can't bring myself to listen to the recordings, that seems wrong.

I admit it, I've been addicted to television for as long as I can remember. I was once a devotee of Fantasy Island. Recently, Amy and I were in Urban Outfitters, who has the lamest website ever, and I found a lovely t-shirt featuring Tattoo driving his little car while making what appears to be the black power sign. Now that's a piece of americana.

Part of this article gives oxygen a hard time because they could be using women to get marketing money by having a women-centered channel on tv. So what? Why is it so bad to make money off your audience? I don't care if I'm being 'exploited' in this way as long as it brings programming I'm interested in.

Have you ever noticed that all the ads during the Price Is Right are for either diapers (stay at home moms) or geritol (retired people)? That show has a growing audience of people my age (27) who have watched it all our lives, why not throw in a little something for us?

Thanks to Ev for linking to my rant about my job search.

One thing I really like about my new job is that the heat works. My previous job never did fix the heater, so now I have a ton of long sleeved shirts that I don't need since it's always the right temperature here. I think people are getting sick of working for startups that have problems like lack of heat, getting evicted and overcrowding. I know I rejoice every time I walk into my cushy office and can work in a short sleeved shirt again, without going outside to warm up.

Feel like an ass?
Silicon Valley is so small. This guy I know was flying to Vegas and started talking to the guys sitting with him. These guys were pretty cocky, since the company they'd founded is doing well. Turns out that their company had hired an ex-coworker of his as CEO. My friend was more than a little drunk and started harrassing them, saying 'why did you hire that idiot, anyway?' They all looked at each other, the seed of doubt had been planted. After that, they stopped talking to my friend but the damage has been done.

I'm still laughing about that one. Good going, drunk ass friend of mine! Here's to you.