Now that I'm working in the 22nd floor, I spend a bit of time in elevators and am forced to think of things to amuse me on the ride. My current project is a series of phrases, all said with a straight face, that will force any stranger in the elevator to turn around with a look of stunned horror. Currently, the repetoire includes the hits "Man, I sure could use some weed right about now" "Hey, do you have any of that crack left from last night." and "I'm thinking of becoming a man, what do you think?"

I tested the crack one on the lone employee of the company we sublease space from who sits on our side. Jeff Ex is his name, or so we think. This has spawned great discussion of the line of products Jeff Ex is sure to create, most of them centered around the porn industry. Anyway, Jeff Ex (who has been seen eating a lonely banana at his desk) was rather amused so I know we're on the right track. Now if I just had some crack....