The other day a sad song came on my ipod (which Andrea was nice enough to load for me with a smattering of every CD we own). It was from Boys on the Side, the last movie I saw with my ex when were breaking up. We both knew that we were at the end of the road (I, of course, didn't know about the nurse who was waiting in the wings for said breakup to happen) but we went to the movie as if it would be a sufficient bandaid to heal a wound that had never been whole.

It wasn't. We broke up three days later, I left the soundtrack behind for her when I moved out.

Andrea had no similar obligation to her own copy and has put it on the ipod. When I heard the song, I thought of that day at the movies and all the heartbreak that came after and then, you know what I did?

I skipped the song and moved on. It's okay to remember, but not always required to dwell. In many ways I thank God for that nurse in the wings because that was the first link in the chain that brought me here, to my eighth year with Andrea, to a life of shared joys and (perhaps a disproportionate) heartache, a wonderful life in the end.

After everything we've been through in the last year, I can say this for sure. I wouldn't trade my life with Andrea for anything.