I've never felt so much like it's us vs. them until the last month or so. With the re-election of Bush and the subsequent revealing of Jesusland, not to mention the great love of Bush displayed at DisneyWorld, and of course, our making public our intent to become parents, it's starting to feel that way. The idea that we're somehow "not moral" and along with that, the idea that being parents entitles us only to adopt a child with special needs (I wonder, do they offer straight white couples that kind of child first?), or one who is not our same race. Because somehow, we're seen as second-class citizens.

It's really starting to get to me as I slowly realize that we'll never really be seen as equal to the people who like the idea of "morals" and "family values." We'll always be second-best. I can only hope that I don't ever start to believe what I hear and agree with them that I deserve any less in this life than they do.


and this is what Blogger heather said...

i was about to reply to your Normal post when i saw this one. after reading both yours and andrea's posts i realized that the real issue was morality, or more specifically, religion.

because as for normalcy, i think that you and andrea have carved out a life pretty similar to the "american dream" (loving relationship, own your house, good jobs, pets and 2.3 kids (albeit en route)), which a lot of people take as the picture of "normal" is or should be. nevermind the fact that a lot of people don't have ANY of those things -- you guys are lucky enough to have the first 4 things and want to go after the fifth to round out your family. good for you!

but - ooops - you're both girls. suddenly you don't have a real family and are not moral? please. i know what the bible says. i also know what the true message is: love. everyone. and true love means respect, honor, integrity, passion, friendship, commitment, faith, patience, and all those other things that get a lot of lip service (particularly by religious types) but very little follow through. i'm willing to bet you want to give all those things to a prospective bundle of joy, and i think that's just marvelous. and moral.

8:59 AM

and this is what Blogger Dan0 said...

My mom's friend in NM went through a huge hassle trying to adopt and they were even looking for Latino babies, too. They just couldn't get a baby and even had a couple of mothers cancel at the last minute.

They were given the same stuff about special needs babies and everything. It sucks, but that is how it goes. The lady who used to do my hair got so frustrated (since most adoption agencies didn't like the fact she was a single woman) that she went to China and adopted a little girl.

What consistently pisses me off is that people like you and Andrea, who would make fantastic parents, can't get a kid while dumb f##k1n morons keep having more and more obnoxious kids so welfare keeps supporting their lazy a$$es. Sorry... pet peeve from the social work days.

If I can help, let me know.

9:09 AM

and this is what Blogger Liz said...

Hey Dan, You can curse freely here. It's not Compuserve anymore, nobody is going to boot your sailor-talking ass off!

10:27 AM


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