Yesterday I took Val to a different branch of our gymnastics place.
We've found ourselves with extra time after school so I thought I'd give
running around and jumping some more a try. In theory, we should get a
discount because it's the same company but holy shit they were confused
by this so for now, I paid full price.

I know, I paid too much.

Anyhoo, Val did really well. She did more of the moves than she's ever
done, log rolling, dinosaur kicking, forward and backward-rolling her
way through the class. Afterwards, I went to pay and fill out forms.

At this point, Val is quite cranky so I'm trying to get it taken care of
quickly (see: I know, I paid too much) so I can get the hell out of
there. I fill out Val's emergency form, which has a line for emergency
contact. I put Andrea's name, and write mother for the relationship.
Lest the chippie behind the desk think that somehow this makes me not
Val's mom, I say, we're a two-mom family so don't be confused when you
see her emergency contact.

My. God. This inspired the chippie in ways I'd not imagined possible or
remotely necessary. Wow! She has a friend who has two moms!

Great, I say, how much do I owe? Undeterred, the chippie keeps going on
and on about how many gay friends she has, how it's no big deal to her,
blah blah.

Meanwhile, Val is getting more and more crabby and I just want to pay
and get the hell out of there. But no. Ms. I'm Gay Friendly just kept
going, despite my polite non-reponses and in the face of my increasingly
upset toddler.

Finally, I pay too much and take Val to the bathroom, thinking we're
finally done with the chippie.

But no. We walk by the desk and she's at it again, telling me how nice
it is that we landed at this sports place, how nice that we feel
comfortable here. Honey, it's not church. It's a business and in the
end, many businesses are glad to take money from pretty much everyone,
even heathens like us.

I murmur and try to get Val out the door as the chippie blathers on.
But no. She wants to know if we saw Ellen the other day. Um, no.
Because you see, BEING GAY DOES NOT DEFINE EVERY ASPECT OF MY FUCKING
LIFE so in fact we seek out the same kind of interesting tv that
everyone else does. I don't drive a gay car, my house is not queer,
though all fixed, our dogs are not genderque.er, we're just people.
We're just a family.

So shut up and let me leave.

Because in the end I think most people want to get on with their daily
lives. No, obviously I'm not keen to get a lot of shit from strangers
about my exciting alternate lifestyle, but even though we're a two-mom
family, that doesn't mean I want to spend an extra 10 minutes hearing
nothing but well-intentioned gay-friendly babble when my child is
melting down.

Some friends of mine were talking about how best to interact with trans
folk that you may meet in the course of your day. Say you figure out
that the person is trans, chances are that person is so not looking for
you to say 'omg! You're trans! I love trans people!'

No, chances are people who are going about their daily lives just want
the same kind of quiet recognition that you'd give anyone else. A
polite smile, a hi, how are you, that's it.

Yes, obviously I shouldn't have said anything to that woman at all. But
if she starts in again I will politely say 'thanks for sharing but we
really need to get home.'

And yes, I paid too much.