It's That Time

Now that I'm starting to get kind of huge, it's getting more obvious to
the General Public that I'm pregnant. Thus far, I've been able to wear
my regular clothes and those kind of hide things. But I'm running out
of clothes that fit so I'm turning to clothes that don't hide things as
well, busting out the giant shirts that I don't need at any other time.


Anyhoo, now that I'm sporting this basketball-esque belly, I'm
remembering why I was so interested in hiding my pregnant-ness.

Because well-meaning people cannot resist the urge to ask the following
question: 'how are you feeling?' Not to mention the ever-popular
variation: 'how's it going?' followed by 'what are you going to name the

Boy do I not feel like answering any of those. Because the truth is
this: first and foremost, this pregnancy is a gift from God, Andrea's
insurance and modern medicine. It's a gift that I'm still not fully
convinced that we've gotten. At any moment, all of the pain and
heartache that carried us to that IVF might come spilling out to said
well-meaning person (usually a stranger/acquaintance). And I just don't
feel like sharing that kind of pain on the fly. Thanks, tho.

The truth is also this: my back hurts more than it did with Val at this
point, my stomach feels stretched to a point where I just do not see how
it could get any bigger, I'm exhausted all the time, I've somehow pulled
a muscle in my crotch and my lady bits are swollen in a way that I can
only pray will resolve itself after this child arrives.

Do you really think the young, male preschool teacher at Val's school
wants to know ANY of that? I'm guessing no. And I'm not about to
share. So I grumble and limp/waddle away in as polite a manner as
possible, only to be accosted by the same question from another young
teacher not 5 seconds later.

I remember at this point with Val being ready for her to arrive, for
people to stop asking about me and start asking about her. I do not
grow tired of telling people how Val is doing, that's for damn sure. I
imagine that when this baby comes, I'll feel the same way about her.

Until that time, mere weeks away, I will continue to brace myself for
the question and experiment with polite but terse ways to answer. Rest
assured that I'm groaning on the inside.

Please don't let this post indicate for one second that I'm not grateful
as hell that we're actually at this point. Rather, it's the opposite,
that I'm so grateful I can't put it into words. Even if I do hurt in
many ways right now.


and this is what Blogger Shelli said...

you could always just say: "You don't want to know. TRUST ME."

or: "Do you REALLY want the answer to that question?"

or: "I pee when I sneeze, my back aches, my vulva is swollen, I can't breathe, and I have Hemorrhoids. But I thank God every day for it. How are you doing?"

Or just print out a business card with that quote, and pass it out.

Hugs, sweetie. I know it's tough to get stupid questions. Alas, people are well, stupid. SO we ignore them, or placate them.

7:49 AM


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