10 Months (and a few days)

Val, I know I posted just the other day. I also know that I'm not keeping up with this blog as often as I could be but... I'm spending the time I'd spend blogging watching you grow up. And that, it is so goddamn much fun I can't quite describe it.

We did a really momentous thing last night -- I went to the store, purchased some soy milk and poured it into a cup for you. I didn't have to lift up my shirt, pump anything or warm up a bottle. I just poured it. Into a cup.

For 10 months now, your primary source of nutrition has come from me. It's been a lot more work than I'd ever really considered and I'm proud as hell of my efforts.

But I am so damn tired of the whole thing. I'm sure that later, much later, I'll look back on our breastfeeding relationship and miss parts of it. But right now, I just want you to get your nutrition from somewhere else. Like the store. Though not from formula. I have not come this far only to give you formula for 2 months. That's stupid. And expensive.

You're going on your first DisneyWorld trip this fall. We bought our tickets this week and I have to say I can't wait to go there with you. The last time we went, we found out you were on your way into this world, returning there with you in tow is going to be awesome.

For now, we're just waiting for the easter bunny.

Not Quite 10 Months

Oh Val. In 2 days, you'll be 10 months. That milestone means a lot of things, most notably for me is that you've been breastfed for 10 months. Which is about 8 months longer than I thought we'd be at this. But I'm proud that I've done this for you. I hope it has all the magical powers that those who love breastfeeding claim it does.

If nothing else, we've saved a crapload of money on formula. Go, us.

But back to you, my sweet girl. You're so big now, I hardly know what to do. Gone is that itty-bitty baby of mine, emerging is the girl you're going to be. I see glimpses of that girl all the time now. I'm excited to meet her but I miss my baby all at the same time.

You're eating everything we put in front of you. You'd rather not eat things that we feed to you, thank you very much. No, you want to put your food directly into your own mouth. I like to do that, too, so how can I argue?

This week, just this week, you figured out how to drink from a cup. Thank Jesus and all his bearded friends for this, because in my mind, it was the key to starting to wean you to cow's milk. Yesterday you carried your cup of water and little snack thing of Cheerios to the park just like a big girl. I was so proud.

But I'm so proud everyday. Proud of your words, which are still holding steady at 'oh' and 'mama' which seems to become 'miii' for milk. Proud of you standing up all by yourself while I read you the Elmo book. Proud of you typing on your own sidekick while we type on ours, the three of us, information junkies. And very much in this together.

10 months ago today, you were due to be born. 10 months. Val, that's almost a year.

On that day, 10 months ago, Andrea and I drove to the hospital to be induced, to help you leave my body and join the world. You sure as hell took your time getting here, even after all that help. But you got here and slowly, the scars on my body and my heart from that experience are healing.

Because your laugh, this amazing thing you save for special occasions, knits back together anything that may have broken during your crazy arrival in this world. Hell, it heals anything that may have ailed me before you.

Soon you will be one year old. 1. But for now, you are still 9 months old and you are our baby girl for just a little while yet.